Confession
I have been hanging out with my ex-boyfriend (as in the one I broke up with last summer) for about two full months now. I've reached some sort of...something, I dunno, a turning point. See, the thing is I don't like all the reasons I've been hanging out with him. Mainly, well at first anyway it was revenge- and that's not me. He started telling me just how much he loves me and wants me back and I told him that I was getting a kick out of watching him grovel. Seriously, I have held nothing back from him. I told him that I do not love him anymore. But never-the-less we have been hanging out and having fun. Only now, while I still have no feelings for him that way, I have kinda started to depend on him as a friend. While I have made friends here in Athens, there isn't anyone here that I can really talk to in person about whatever I need to talk about. So even though I've told him to stop telling me how he feels about me doesn't change the fact that he is still in love with me. So what should I do? Part of me says I should end it because it would be the right thing- I'm just leading him on (you know the whole actions speak louder than words thing). The other side doesn't want to end it because I will miss the support and friendship- but is that just being selfish? And believe me, the "just being friends" thing is not an option (it has been tried).
posted by imagine @ 11:32 PM
3 Comments:
I'd say for SURE, you have to let him go. The thing is that you DON'T love him. And he does love you. Though you've been honest with him, he can't see past his love for you. He is blind. In the end, the longer you hang on and justify yourself, he may resent you in the end.
I'm sure you're right. It is probably best to hurt him now, before it goes any further. I feel like such a bad person.
don't. it's difficult not to believe that though you are "telling" him where you are, that he would rather put you over himself. it's a strange thing. i've been there. on both sides.
i had a very hard break-up. the girl left very quickly after 9/11 and went "back to God". it was crazy. i didn't argue it. we were together for a few years and everything was butterflies the whole time.
in the end, the best thing she did for me...while painful at the time was to set a clear line. very clear.
and i still think of her fondly.
there were many things she told me later....what she had wanted to say before...how she wanted to stay in my life...but she sacrificed herself because she wanted to save me.
i've never had a bad thought about her.
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